My Grandfather's Blessings - Suggested Discussion Questions

For those who are unable to complete the reading prior to our meeting, I provide a list of passages and questions from the reading so that you have something to reflect upon. These passages and questions are simply a guideline to jump start conversation. As always, my preference is that you spend the entire evening sharing your answer to the final question.

Befriending Life: Pg 248 "A teacher is someone who has learned how to listen to life. Someone who has found a way to listen well. Any real teacher is only a pointing finger. In the end, we may find out more by not following our teachers but by following what our teachers follow for ourselves. From a good teacher you may learn the secret of listening. You will never learn the secrets of life. You will have to listen for yourself."

• Who are your teachers? Please share one who may be a public figure, as well as one with whom you've had a personal encounter. What have these two teachers "pointed" you towards?
  

Pg 249-250 "Bless anything that shows you wisdom. Anything that shows you wisdom has become a part of who you are and had drawn you closer to life. The Tibetans have reverence for those who have passed along to them the priceless gift of the wisdom to live well. Perhaps this means having reverence for all of life, the ant and the hawk, the enemy and the friend, the lover and the parent and the child. All have offered us the opportunity to know ourselves and to know life. The chance to befriend life. This is true of our wins and losses, our illnesses, our celebrations, our joys and sorrows. All offer us wisdom. Bless them all."

• I truly appreciate Dr. Remen's suggestion that even those situations and people who incite 'negative' reactions from me deserves a blessing because of the proffered chance to open myself to the wisdom to be gained from my reaction. So often we are encouraged to dismiss or downplay the 'negative', that I feel guilty after it rises up within me. What is your opinion on her perspective of blessing both the "wins and losses"?

 

Restoring the World: Pg 325 "The view from the edge of life is different and often much clearer than the way that most of us see things. Life-threatening illness may cause people to question what they have accepted as unchanging. Values that have been passed down in a family for generations may be recognized as inadequate; lifelong beliefs about personal capacities or what is important may prove to be mistaken. When life is stripped down to its very essentials, it is surprising how simple things become. Fewer and fewer things matter and those that matter, matter a great deal more. "

• I've read this often -- how life-threatening illness can bring clarity and simplicity into one's life. As the holiday's approach and I find myself wading through the "should's" to focus on that which is truly important, I ask myself how can I gain that clarity and simplicity without the trial by fire? Do you have any specific suggestions on what to do to gain that clarity?

 

Overall: Was there a particular passage that made you stop and either consider or appreciate?