Eat, Pray, Love - Suggested Discussion Questions on "Book Three Indonesia"

For those who are unable to complete the reading prior to our meeting, I provide a list of passages and questions from the reading so that you have something to reflect upon. These passages and questions are simply a guideline to jump start conversation. As always, my preference is that you spend the entire evening sharing your answer to the final question.

On the surface, Book 3 seemed superficial compared to the revelations that Elizabeth Gilbert experiences in Book Two India. And yet there are passages, such as these, that bring the entire book into balance ... Book Three is as important a part of her journey as the preceding books, and could not have happened without her preceding experiences. Pg 329 "Yet what keeps me from dissolving right now into a complete fairy-tale shimmer is this solid truth, a truth which has veritably built my bones over the last few years—I was not rescued by a prince; I was the administrator of my own rescue."

• Pg 251 This was a familiar idea to me. It's very Indian, very Yogic. The notion is that human beings are born, as my Guru has explained many times, with the equivalent potential for both contraction and expansion. The ingredients of both darkness and light are equally present in all of us, and then it's up to the individual (or the family, or the society) to decide what will be brought forth—the virtues or the malevolence. The madness of this planet is largely a result of the human being's difficulty in coming into virtuous balance with himself. Lunacy (both collective and individual) results. "So what can we do about the craziness of the world?""Nothing."Ketut laughed, but with a dose of kindness. "This is nature of world. This is destiny. Worry about your craziness only—make you in peace.""But how should we find peace within ourselves?"I asked Ketut. "Meditation,"he said. "Purpose of meditation is only happiness and peace—very easy.
  • This quote emphasizes the critical importance of each individual finding balance within, as a means to mitigate the lunacy that society is experiencing. It echoes the familiar refrain "Let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me."Do you believe there is validity to this perspective?
  • Does this make Elizabeth Gilbert's pursuit of pleasure, devotion and balance to be self-nurturing or self-centered? Why?

 

• Pg 260 This is a practice I've come to call "Diligent Joy". As I focus on Diligent Joy, I also keep remembering a simple idea my friend Darcy told me once—that all the sorrow and trouble of this world is caused by unhappy people. Not only in the big global Hitler-'n'-Stalin picture, but also on the smallest personal level. Even in my own life, I can see exactly where my episodes of unhappiness have brought suffering or distress or (at the very least) inconvenience to those around me. The search for contentment is, therefore, not merely a self-preserving and self-benefiting act, but also a generous gift to the world. Clearing out all your misery gets you out of the way. You cease being an obstacle, not only to yourself but to anyone else. Only then are you free to serve and enjoy other people.
  • One thing I truly loved about this section is how it highlights my own tendency to overcomplicate things, by providing plenty of examples, like "smile with your liver", of how simple things can be. I found this passage to be a wonderful reminder of that. What was your opinion?
  • Do you have your own Diligent Joy practice? What are the key elements of it? Do you notice a difference when you inadvertently slide away from it?

 

• Pg 325 The Yogic sages say that all the pain of a human life is caused by words, as is all the joy. We create words to define our experience and those words bring attendant emotions that jerk us around like dogs on a leash. We get seduced by our own mantras (I'm a failure ... I'm lonely ... I'm a failure ... I'm lonely ... ) and we become monuments to them. To stop talking for a while, then, is to attempt to strip away the power of words, to stop choking ourselves with words, to liberate ourselves from our suffocating mantras.
  One of my Diligent joy practices is Non-violent Communication, founded by Dr. Marshall Rosenberg. He believes that physical and verbal violence are the culmination of thoughts/words either expressed and unheard, or never said, so he has developed a way of speaking that is intended to bring clarity to our way of expressing and listening. After 20 years of marriage, it has been the most transformative practice that I've found.
  • Do you believe that words have power? What are some of your personal mantras ... either "good"or "bad"?
  • The 10-days of silence that Elizabeth Gilbert experiences are called a "vipassana retreat" and are widely available in the US. Would you consider participating in one? Why or why not?

   

• Pg 328 I knew then that this is how God loves us all and receives us all, and that there is no such thing in this universe as hell, except maybe in our own terrified minds. Because if even one broken and limited human being could experience even one such episode of absolute forgiveness and acceptance of her own self, then imagine—just imagine!—what God, in all His eternal compassion, can forgive and accept.
  • I admire Elizabeth Gilbert's bravery and commitment to spiritual practices, such as the days of silence and the loving-kindness meditation. This passage, which is the culmination of the loving-kindness meditation, brought tears to my eyes. Whether you believe in the existence of God or not, after reading this, what are your opinions about an individual's capacity for absolute self-forgiveness and self-acceptance? Do you believe that this is something you can offer yourself?




• Was there a particular passage that made you stop and either consider or appreciate?